Learn 5 Ways to Stop Complaining

       

We have begun our study of appreciation, gratitude and thankfulness on MWA Coaching through the 3-way Promise of Mahalo (living in thankfulness) in this framework:

• Knowing Mahalo through Appreciation
• Becoming Mahalo through Gratitude
• Sharing Mahalo through Thankfulness

Currently we are concentrating on appreciation, and it brought something to mind for me that I could share with you as another Lx5 (LearnED in 5 keepers), though this one always qualifies for me as continual LearnING too! Here are,

5 ways to Stop Complaining

Have you noticed that those who are appreciative rarely complain?

Appreciation is terrific medicine for curing the complainer’s bug, for it helps us to recognize what is right with us instead of our focusing on what might be wrong or missing. To borrow Starbucker’s favorite adjective, appreciation fuels the “half-full” view shared by those positive people who are optimists.

1. Instead of thinking “I have to,” say to yourself, “I get to.”

2. Instead of hurting with pain, recognize the signal.

3. Instead of saying “you did this,” examine how “I created this.”

4. Instead of lodging a complaint, make a request.

5. Instead of demanding something, shine a light on what you would appreciate.

Can you imagine how wonderful a world we could create if we all just stopped complaining?
~ Rosa Say

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Just clicking in? Catch up with my other Lx5s this month:

• A Mahalo November: Learned with 5
• GTD Learned with 5 Take-Aways

Post Author:
Rosa Say is the founder of Say Leadership Coaching, and author of Managing with Aloha, Bringing Hawaii’s Universal Values to the Art of Business.

Read more about Mahalo, the Hawaiian value of appreciation, gratitude and thankfulness on Rosa’s coaching blog this month, Managing with Aloha Coaching. Start here ~ Mahalo: 3-way Promise, 5-fold Learning.

Comments

[Ariane Benefit]

What a wonderful world it would be! I learned about this organization called http://acomplaintfreeworld.org last year. You would love it! They give people a bracelet to wear to remind them not to complain. And it's Free! : )

[Rosa Say]

Thank you for sharing that link Ariane, I had not heard about A Complaint Free World, and you're right - I do love it! Fabulous take on the notion that we can create and set a better habit in 21 days - and not complaining is a good one to start with.

[Dwayne Melancon]

Love this post. It reminds me of a technique I learned a while back. It starts with "trying on beliefs" which is a way of saying to yourself something akin to "just humor me and pretend this next thing is true."

Then, you do two things:

1) Pretend you create everything that happens to you; now, what did you do to create your current situation?

2) Pretend you are creating your own ticket out of this situation; what will you create?

Very liberating. Thanks for reminding me of this, Rosa!

[Rosa Say]

Now that you mention it Dwayne, I do remember you writing something about that on Genuine Curiosity... would you give us the link to your article?

Great technique and concept - "trying on beliefs," for belief takes on more commitment to a thought than when we stop at just "thinking about it." And we do create so much of our own perceptions - we do, and we CAN yet again... powerful intention-releaser.

[Sandra]

Rosa and all :-)
I like this post, too. Let me add this thought: I appreciate in my life that I may choose the glasses (form, colour, size), the kind of fluids and the filling quantity when I pour it in. When my wonderful mouth-blown glass of... lets say Champaign is empty, that also means that I had enjoyed it before. It also works with a cup of tea, of course. (Mine has a smiling cat on it and bio fair trade Yogitea in it... :)

[Rosa Say]

That is a great thought Sandra - thank you! The theme we seem to be developing here is definitely the freedom of choice we have, and I like your metaphor.

[Dwayne Melancon]

Sure, Rosa - good memory! It's Pretend you create everything that happens to you at:
http://www.genuinecuriosity.com/genuinecuriosity/2005/05/pretend_you_cre.html